It’s easy to get stuck in a rut, and it can be tough to find your way out of it. When you’re feeling down or experience sadness for some reason, it can seem impossible to feel happy again.
But there are things that we can do in order to fix our unhappinesses and help us become happier people!
This article discusses how to identify what is making you unhappy (or what has made you unhappy), why those things make us miserable, and how we can fix them so that we don’t have them getting in the way of being happy ever again.
How To Be Happy Again:
1. Consider The Moment That You Were No Longer Happy
When you are wondering how to be happy again, it implies that you were happy at one point in time. So, the first step is to think about the moment when you were happy, and what happened that made you no longer feel that way.
It may have been that a loved one unexpectedly passed away or that you were laid off from a job that you was your dream job. Perhaps it is because you have started aging and the physical change may be incredibly difficult for you.
Whatever it is that has made you unhappy, try your best to find the root of the issue and see if there is something that can be done about it.
If someone just passed away, for example, then finding a new job may not help with how upset you are. You need to allow yourself to grieve properly before you will be able to be happy again.
If aging has been difficult for you because this was an unexpected change in life or because society makes it so hard to feel positive and empowered despite getting older, then talking to a therapist might do more good than anything else.
Whatever the reason, it is important to identify why this event or situation made you unhappy, so that we can fix those things and not have them getting in the way of being happy again.
2. Don’t Constantly Chase Happiness
It is important not to fake happiness or to chase it as a final goal. This is because chasing happiness will only lead to more unhappiness, and you’ll end up feeling like nothing ever satisfies you.
Instead of chasing after it as your final destination, let go of perfection and satisfy yourself with the little things that instead make life worth living. These things may include:
- A conversation with someone who listens and understands how you feel
- A warm cup of coffee or tea when it is cold outside.
These are just two examples of what can bring temporary relief from unhappiness without pushing us towards something we cannot have or do not want.
3. Consider What Happiness Feels Like In The Present
How happiness feels will change depending on the person, their current situation and the current stage in life.
It is important to understand that happiness will change over your life time. Take for example, when you are young, you may feel happy after a fun day with friends.
However, when you are older, you might be happiest when you engage with new experiences instead, such as traveling.
There isn’t one way to measure happiness or say that it will always come from what we expect it to originate from. What matters most is finding something that brings us joy now and knowing that this feeling will change over time as our needs do too.
When you ensure that your happiness is closer to satisfaction and contentment, you will find that there is less of a need for false joy.
It will also ensure that your happiness will remain relatively consistent over time.
4. Consider What It Is That Truly Makes You Happy
As previously mentioned, what makes you feel good will change over time. So, it’s important to take a look at what makes you happy now.
It may be different in the long term, but understanding and acknowledging why something is making us happy can help keep it sustainable for when our needs change too.
For example, you may used to love spending time with a good friend but now when you spend time with that same person. You go away feeling exhausted, drained, or fatigued.
This may be because in the past, spending time with that friend was enjoyable. Perhaps you had a lot in common but over time your lifestyle and goals have changed and they no longer align with your friend’s lifestyle and goals.
So, when you meet with this same person now, they make you feel frustrated or drained and as such, their company no longer makes you feel good.
Therefore, when considering what makes us happy we need to know how to identify why something is making us happy.
It also means we need to let go of the things that are holding us back or are no longer making us happy.
This way if our goals change or are not met then we have an idea of what we’re looking for next, so that can achieve greater levels of contentment and satisfaction over time without feeling like there’s something missing from our lives.
5. Consider What Is Preventing You From Being Happy
More often than not, there is a deeper issue that you may need to consider when it comes to what may be preventing you from truly being happy.
As such, it’s important to look at the bigger picture and figure out what the issue may be.
Examine whether or not there may be an issue with a relationship in your life, job dissatisfaction, physical health concerns like depression or anxiety – all of this can have an effect on how we feel about our lives and ourselves as individuals.
It’s hard when things are going wrong in one area of our lives, so that other areas can sometimes seem destined for failure too.
Depression may be a deeper issue when it comes to something that is preventing your happiness.
What does being depressed mean? Depression is characterized by persistent sadness, feelings of guilt or worthlessness, low energy levels and poor sleep patterns for at least two weeks.
It affects people differently depending on their personality type but there are common symptoms such as; lacking concentration, feeling uncomfortable in social situations, or losing interest in activities you used to enjoy.
Depression often stems from childhood trauma and neglect which has led some people to have low self-esteem and negative thoughts about themselves.
Counseling can help as well because this allows you to express how you’re feeling while also looking at ways to challenge these feelings.
Other factors such as genetics, chemical imbalances in the brain, a lack of sleep or an unhealthy lifestyle may also contribute to depression.
The most important thing to do is to understand what it is that is preventing you from feeling good because only then are you able to take the necessary steps to move forward.
6. Understand That Difficult Times Are Unfortunately A Part Of Life
It is important to understand that hard and difficult times are a part of life.
The sooner you realize this and can start moving forward with your goals for yourself, which will help improve how happy you feel about your future self and even be grateful for what you have now. Not focusing so much on those things that may or may not happen later down the road.
Even though it might seem impossible at first (especially when you are going through something) try to push through those feelings by refusing them an inch of mental space.
It is important to have hope that things will get better. This can be done by understanding the way you are feeling, determining why those feelings exist in the first place and then looking for ways of overcoming them.
Life events such as job loss or divorce may lead to unhappiness because they change our life situation so drastically.
This means we need a new routine which takes time to establish, people who used to support us might not be there anymore etc. It also changes how we feel about ourselves.
When we understand that difficult times are a part of life we can tackle them head on and not allow those situations to steal our happiness or joy.
7. Make Sure To Always Take Care Of Yourself
Taking care of yourself is so important when it comes to understanding how we can be happy again.
This is because when we take care of ourselves it means that we are prioritizing how our own needs fit into the equation.
Self care is so important because it is a great way to start feeling better and it also has some incredible health benefits.
For instance, when you take care of yourself physically by getting enough sleep, exercising or eating well, your mental health will improve as a result, which can have a huge impact on how we feel about ourselves in general.
We all deserve to be the best version of ourselves, so make sure that this is what you are striving for every single day!
9. Create A Goal And Focus On Your Progress
Creating a goal and focusing on the progress you have made is important when it comes to how to be happy again.
To be happy again we need to focus not on what is going wrong in our life but how can we change it for the better, so that happiness becomes a reality once more.
It’s important not to feel overwhelmed by where you are now and focus on the goal you have set and what steps you need to take to get you closer to accomplishing your goal.
If your goal is to lose weight, it might seem like an overwhelming task but if you break up the process into smaller goals then it becomes more achievable.
For example, instead of worrying about how much weight you need to lose overall, think about how many pounds each week you want to shed.
It may sound trivial but setting those small tasks for yourself can really help keep things in perspective.
When we focus on our progress we are able to see change and make positive progress over a period of time and it builds up our self belief. Accomplishing our goals will help us feel better about ourselves.
Having goals and aspirations will also help you get through those low situations because you are able to see an end goal, which makes everything seem easier.
10. Don’t Rely On Other Things Or Other People To Make You Happy
The truth is that when you rely on other things or people to make you happy, you will never really be satisfied or content with life.
Looking externally for things or people to make you happy, will never work. This is because outside things or people are never going to be able to provide you with the unconditional love and support that only you can give yourself.
It is important for you to stop worrying about what other people are doing and just focus on finding things in life that make you happy. By thinking about your own needs and feelings, you will be setting yourself up for a win in life.
11. Purchase Experiences And Not Things
When you find yourself heading to the mall, think to yourself, is this purchase going to make me happy? More often than not, it will give you a quick fix but not lasting happiness.
Purchasing experiences rather than possessions are essential when it comes to becoming happy again.
Instead of spending your money on new clothes or shoes, go to the movies with a friend instead.
To improve your happiness, try getting out and exploring new places. Spend time in parks, on trails, or by the ocean.
These types of experiences will fulfill you so much more than the momentary satisfaction of purchasing something.
12. Live In The Moment and Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
When you try to live in the moment and stop comparing yourself to others that are seemingly living better lives than yours, this will make you happy again.
When we compare ourselves to others we will take on this mentality of trying to “keep up with the Jones’.”
This will result in you feeling dejected because you don’t have the things that other people do.
Try living in the moment and focus on what is happening right now instead of dwelling on what has happened or might happen.
In order to be happy again it’s necessary for us to change how we think about life-both past and future.
We must shift from a mindset of “woe is me” to one focused on acceptance of how things are today and focusing on appreciating all that’s good around us today without worrying about tomorrow.
The only thing we can control, our present state, is where happiness lies.
13. Remove Negativity From Your Life
Removing negativity from your life will help curb any negative feelings you may have and allow for them to be replaced with positive ones instead.
Negative emotions create stress, which leads us away from happiness. The truth is that having negative people in our life is only going to make us even more unhappy.
It is important to recognize that some people will simply be toxic to us and we need to remove them from our life.
Distancing yourself from those negative people is the healthiest thing for you to do until their behavior changes.
14. Change Your Perspective On Life
Many of us are not happy with our lives but don’t realize how great we have it because we are too focused on what’s not working instead of focusing on all that is good around us.
In order to be happy again, you must change your perspective and focus on the positives, both big and small in your life rather than dwelling on what has happened or might happen.
True happiness cannot be found if we do not feel like our efforts matter. So, surround yourself with people who share a positive perspective on life and who recognize all that you do for them.
A positive, optimistic attitude is the key to happiness and success in life.
15. Get Creative With Your Hobbies
The next step in understanding how to be happy again is to get creative with your hobbies, trying new things are exciting for us, so they feel fresh instead of repetitive and often times can get us out of a rut.
You can also take on a hobby or activity that has previously brought you satisfaction before. It can also help if these activities were things that didn’t require much money.
Examples of hobbies include; cooking at home rather than going out all the time, taking up photography, reading books about other cities or going on walks to discover new places.
You will be amazed at how these little things can make you so much happier.
16. Utilize the Power of Your Mindset
It’s important to understand that your mindset will affect how happy you are in life, so focus on cultivating a positive outlook and learning whatever lessons may arise from negative experiences instead of dwelling on them.
Find ways to be grateful for what you have, no matter how small or big it is. Rather than focusing solely on what you don’t have.
It is also helpful to create tangible gratitude. For example, you could write down three good things that you appreciate every day before going to bed, taking time out just for yourself during the week, and filling your days with purposeful tasks that bring fulfillment.
Taking control of your thoughts is really important when you are trying to be happy again. Often when we are not happy, our thoughts can tend to dwell on the worst case scenario.
When we begin to think in this negative way, we need to take control of those thought and not allow our mind to dwell in an unhealthy or unhappy place.
17. Remember You Are Loved And Wanted
When it comes to finding your happiness again, understanding your value is important. Remember that you are loved and wanted.
Even if you don’t have close family that can support you in tough times, you may have a close friend who will be there for you instead.
Building supportive and kind relationships is important because they can help us a great deal when dealing with unhappiness or depression.
When you feel loved and wanted, happiness quickly becomes a reality. This is because you have a sense of belonging and your self-esteem is boosted.
18. Recognize What You’ve Accomplished
It’s important to celebrate what you have been able to accomplish because it will give you the motivation you may need to keep going when things get tough on the road to finding happiness again.
When we’re feeling down or overwhelmed, our accomplishments can be difficult to remember, which just makes us feel worse about ourselves instead of better.
So, take some time out during the day and think back over all that you accomplished that week.
For example, did you exercise this week? Did you accomplish the work project you set out to do? Did you spend quality time with family members?
Take into account those moments where everything seemed like it was going to be too much for you and celebrate them, because they are worth celebrating.
The road to becoming happy again isn’t always smooth sailing and quick. It may take time, so embrace the journey and understand that it will be filled with ups and downs.
When we recognize and celebrate our accomplishments, we take the time to feel better about where we are at in life. This will keep us on track with maintaining and pursuing happiness.
19. Don’t Be Too Hard On Yourself When You’re Not Happy
One of the main reasons people aren’t happy is because they are too hard on themselves. This means that any mistakes will be magnified in your mind and you’ll question every decision until there’s no more peace to be found.
That doesn’t mean being easy on yourself either; just find someone who can offer another perspective when things feel bleakest for you. Someone with whom you can vent all those feelings without fear of judgement from them.
Often times we strive for perfection in life and when we don’t reach that we are incredibly quick to beat ourselves up about it.
Instead, make sure that you are being patient with yourself. When you are not happy or feeling depressed, take it one day at a time. Give yourself space to make mistakes but instead of dwelling in your pitty, pick yourself up and keep moving forward.
20. Practice Gratitude Every Single Day
Happiness often comes from counting our blessings instead of worrying about everything we lack. Take a moment to think about what are some things in your life right now that make you grateful.
Remind yourself every day how much good there is around you. By practicing gratitude each day we can find happiness in small things.
Practicing gratitude will help us stay grounded, show compassion for others when they are sad or hurting, and remind ourselves of all the good that is within reach if only we choose to see it and appreciate it!
Here are some ways you could express your gratefulness:
- Write a note of appreciation to someone who has made an impact on your life recently
- Make a list of three things you’re grateful for every day until you get into a habit – maybe write them down at night before bedtime (or first thing in the morning)
21. Live In The Moment instead of Focusing On The Past
Living in the moment and not focusing on the past is really important when you are wanting to regain your happiness.
This is important because a lot of unhappiness stems from dwelling on what has happened in the past or projecting into an imagined future something that might never come to fruition.
If we can live fully in this moment then all our worries about pain in the past and potential downsides for tomorrow are gone. Focus on enjoying your life right now rather than wishing you were somewhere else.
Living in the moment may look like doing something fun that you enjoy doing, or simply taking some time out of your day to stop and smell the roses. It’s really about being happy in each moment because we can never go back.
22. Forgive Yourself
Learning to forgive ourselves is so important when it comes to being happy again. This is because, more often than not, when we feel sad, it can be a result of our own actions.
It is important not only to forgive others but also ourselves for any wrongs committed and there are no exceptions here.
This one may be a little hard if you have been holding on to resentment from long ago. However, it just takes practice and dedication.
You might notice how much better you feel when someone else forgives you so why shouldn’t we? We all need forgiveness at times, so give this gift yourself every day by releasing resentments over what has gone before.
Learn from your mistakes and simply let go of the resentment you may have for yourself. This will allow you to live a free and happy life.
The Bottom Line
When we want to be happy again we need to understand the reasons why we are unhappy and how past events have shaped us into who we are today.
We must also know that happiness is not a destination but rather it’s an ongoing journey of constant self-discovery, so as long as you’re on the right path then everything will turn out okay in the end.
Let go of regrets from your past that no longer serve any purpose in your life anymore because they can’t be changed anyway, learning new coping mechanisms when things feel like they may become unbearable again and focus on becoming the best version of yourself.
Also, remember that it is okay for there to be bad moments in life, just as long as they don’t consume us and prevent us from living our best life right now then we have nothing to fear. That is because those low times will eventually pass on their own accord.