A popular question among people now-a-days is how to know if you like someone. Well, for most people, it’s the obvious signs like getting nervous when that person enters the room, constantly checking how you look when you know that they will be around, making sure you smell nice, and getting goosebumps when you’re around them. However, there are other signs that most people tend to dismiss for something else.
Understanding how you feel about someone could be tricky for many reasons. Maybe you’ve just met them, so you’re not really sure if they’re worth pursuing, or perhaps they’ve been your friend for so long that you’re confused about what you feel and don’t want to take the risk and potentially lose your best friend.
The good news is that it is possible to find clarity in your emotions. Here are signs that can help you uncover if you truly like someone or if it’s just a fling.
First Consider These 5 Questions
The first thing you need to do is ask yourself whether you like someone (as a friend or more) and look for ways to tell if they like you back. For example, do you enjoy spending quality time with them? There are five questions you need to ask yourself to determine if you’ve met that special someone.
1. Do You Feel Good Around Them?
Before you decide to make that person a regular part of your life, it is important to ask yourself whether you feel good around them. We aren’t recommending that you depend on another person for happiness, but it should come naturally that you feel good just being around that person. Ask yourself if you’re happy when you are around them and if you enjoy spending quality time with them.
2. How Often Do You Think About Them?
When someone really likes a person, they end up thinking about that person all the time. The same way we often find ourselves thinking about our close friends and loved ones. That’s also the case when you meet a person you like. You have a constant urge to chat to them and reach out to them to talk about your day or when you see something that you think they may like or find funny.
If you find yourself thinking about a person often, then there’s a likelihood that you really like them.
Related: How To Make Your Relationships Last: 7 Tips For A Happy Relationship
3. What Is It That Draws You To Them?
When you realize that you’re starting to really like someone and could see yourself falling in love with them, it helps to make a list of the things that you like about them. This isn’t often hard but try to focus on what you like about their character, the way they treat you and how they respect you, rather than what you like about their looks.
4. What Do You Dislike About Them?
As much as you may like someone, it is also helpful to consider what you may dislike about them. No one is perfect, and it’s normal to have a couple of items on this list. This type of pro/cons list helps clarify how you feel and confirm why you are interested in pursuing a relationship with them. Either you like them a lot, or you don’t.
5. Do You Feel The Need To Share Everything With Them?
A good way to tell if you like someone is to take note if you can’t wait to share important things in your life with them. Whenever something happens to you, you can’t wait to share it with them. Even the small things in life that make you laugh or annoy you – you feel the need to share. You may even text them at work, just wanting to know how their day has been.
Related: How to Connect with People: 12 Effective Ways to Connect with Anyone
Can You Like Someone And Not Even Know It?
It is possible to like someone without even knowing you do. How can that happen? Well, it has to do with our minds. There are instances where you may like someone and not know because that person doesn’t necessarily fit into your “ideal person” list. You may think that for certain reasons, you can’t possibly be interested in that person.
Maybe you’ve known them for a while, and your feelings for them aren’t strong but are still there. Alternatively, it could be a new date, and you may have questions as to whether they are worth pursuing because they may not exactly align with the person you are usually interested in. In this type of situation, it’s worth waiting for the first two or three dates to go by before determining whether what you feel is more than just a fling.
Here are more tips to help you uncover your hidden feelings.
How To Know If You Like Someone:
1. Spot The Difference Between Being Attracted To Them And Liking Them
Love has a way of making you feel like you’re on top of the world. It’s one of the best feelings to experience and can make you euphoric. But there’s a difference between attraction or infatuation and truly liking someone. Initially, you may feel sexually attracted to the other person, but you discover that you’re not necessarily smitten with them later on. Yes, they are attractive, but there’s no connection to them on a deeper level.
Some of the signs of whether you genuinely like someone include:
- You’re more drawn to their personality than their looks
- You like spending quality time with them, so that you can get to know them better on a deeper level
What you need to ask yourself is, do you like them, or are you simply preoccupied with the idea of them? With physical lust, the issue is always that you or the other person is sexually attracted because of looks/appearance but is not necessarily interested in getting to know the other person on a deeper level.
Love takes time to grow and so, it’s crucial for you to take it slow. Remember the golden rule: Attraction mostly has to do with appearance, but liking someone means that there’s more.
Related: How To Set Healthy Boundaries In Relationships: Practical Strategies
2. Have You Been Unsure About Your Feelings For Long?
If you’ve been mulling over your feelings for a long time, then there’s a high chance that you’re not as into your crush, as you thought you might be. You’re procrastinating in making a decision. If you are delaying and unsure about your feelings then this person may be more of a friend then someone you like. If you really liked them then you would risk the friendship and ask them out.
Love has often been described as friendship on fire. If you really liked your friend, you wouldn’t hesitate to at least attempt to make it more.
Related: How to Stop Being Insecure in a Relationship: Rebuild Your Self Esteem
3. What About Your Friends?
Love has often been described as being blind. As such, friends are important because they’ll often be able to see what you may not be able to see. Since your friends know you well, they can tell when you have a simple crush or really like someone. They’ll be able to spot whether there is chemistry between the two of you and can also let you know if the person is great/makes you happy or if there are some concerns such as your crush may be controlling etc.
Although you are the best person to decide at the end of the day, your friends’ opinions are important and can help you see things you may have missed.
4. Is Your Ex Still On Your Mind?
If you’ve recently experienced a breakup and are still thinking about your ex, then chances are that you need to take some time with the new person and not rush into anything. It’s often hard to get over someone you dated. However, it’s also not fair to rush into something if your heart is still hung up over your ex.
If you’re still thinking about your ex more than you’re thinking about spending time with someone else, then it’s best to wait until you are completely over your ex, so that you can move on with your life.
5. Are You Acting As If You Are Their Hero?
Is their well-being a top priority for you? Do you show up when they need you? Do you put your arms around them when they feel vulnerable?
If you have noticed that you have protective instincts towards someone then you probably like them or alternatively, you notice that your new crush has protective instincts towards you, then that’s a surefire sign that they like you as well. Allow them to do things for you because when you let them step up to the plate and protect you or look after you, then you’ll be sending the signal that you like them just as much as they like you.
The desire to be a hero, or as psychologists call it, the hero instinct, is primarily applicable to men. Men have a biological tendency to want to be the hero in a relationship. They want to be admired and want to show their partner that they can be there for them. This is a deeply rooted male wiring.
The hero instinct explains why men fall in love and who they fall in love with. So, if you like a guy, you should put effort into making them feel like a hero. They need to feel that you genuinely need them and want them around.
6. How Much Do You Know About Your New Crush?
When you really like someone and think that you’re falling in love with someone, it’s important to think about how much you know about them. What do you know about their life? Their work or the people they spend time with? What are people saying about them around town? Do they have a good or bad reputation?
When we like someone, we tend to automatically put them on a pedestal. We get so excited that we may ignore red flags that arise. This is why it’s essential to take things slow and get to really know the person before moving the relationship to the next level.
Related: How To Talk To A Girl: Practical Tips To Starting That Conversation
7. Do You Envision A Future With Them?
One sign that you like someone is that you are able to picture a life with them. This doesn’t often happen straight off the bat when you meet someone. Sometimes, you can tell from the start that they are not relationship material.
However, if you can picture yourself in a deeper relationship with them, then it’s a sign that your feelings are real and possibly deeper than you initially thought they were. Wanting to create future plans with someone is also proof that there’s more between the two of you than just an attraction.
8. Does The Thought Of Them With Being Someone Else Make You Envious?
One sign that you like someone is that you feel jealous when you think about them being with someone else. When you start feeling territorial about someone, it’s a sign that your feelings go deeper than just attraction.
The truth is that you’d be a little sad or even hurt if they told you that they were seeing someone else. It sounds crazy, but you see them as yours, and you want them in your life.
9. Do You Want To Know Them More?
Are you interested in spending time with the person you like to get to know them better? You want to know their best friend, understand their past, talk about their goals, and interests? If you feel that you’ve been talking for a while, but you don’t know your date well, then it’s a telltale sign that you may only be attracted to their appearance.
When you like someone, you’ll notice that you want to know even the most minor details about them and vice versa.
10. Are You Overlooking Red Flags?
Often when we like someone, we can miss the red flags. Yes, no one is perfect, however, some people don’t think twice about the glaring red signs. If you are guilty of this, then it might be that you’re more interested in the idea of being in a relationship rather than liking them for who they are.
People are likely to ignore red flags when they think their intuition is wrong or if they are in denial. Yet, you should look out for red signs to avoid ending up in a toxic relationship.
Related: 20 Red Flags in a Relationship That You Should Never Ignore
11. You’re Still On The Market
Are you still engaging with other people on dating apps or in the bar? Are you still willing to go out on blind dates? If that’s the case, there may not be a connection between you and the person you thought you liked.
When you really like someone, you won’t keep your options open. You’ll want to focus all of your energy, time, and attention on them. You will also in-turn like the attention that they give you, and you’ll be committed to making things work out.
Liking someone has a way of shifting our focus solely to that person and away from other potential partners. There’s always the possibility that things won’t work out, but until you’re ready to take that risk and be vulnerable with the person you like, then you’re not giving that relationship a chance.
12. You Can’t Picture Life Without Them
Simply put, in the short period of time that you’ve met this person, you can’t imagine life without them. You feel like they have taken over your world and bring you so much happiness. Your day brightens up whenever they are around.
Alternatively, when you feel that you’d be better off alone, then they are probably not meant for you. Think about how you’ll feel if they simply walked out of your life. If you would be fine, then perhaps they aren’t the one for you.
13. You Frequently Reach Out To Them For Help
The beauty of dating is that you have someone to reach out to when in trouble. Take for example, you need something fixed like your computer if it is acting up, or you need advice from them concerning an issue, then these are telltale signs that you care and value them. They become your go-to person, whenever you need help.
People that are self-dependent often find it difficult at times to ask for help. But it’s important to do so from time to time, as it fosters the connection between the two of you especially in men. This is because feeling essential or important to a woman helps them spot the distinction between “like” and “love.”
In an authentic way, it is important to show the person you’re with that you need them. Instead of doing things alone, allow them to take up some space in your life and help you when you are in need.
14. You’ve Thought About Making A Move
Gone are the days when men necessarily always needed to make the first move. In today’s female empowered world, there are female-led relationships. Some men find a confident woman who leads as attractive. Men like receiving compliments just as much as women do, and so you could make the first step and see how it turns out.
If you’ve been spending time with someone and you feel that it’s time to turn the friendship into a relationship, then that’s a clear sign that you’re smitten with that individual. The fact that you feel that way proves that you desire to have this individual in your world. In that case, there’s nothing wrong with you making the first move.
Be it a man or a woman, anyone can make the first-move. If they make you feel like you want to spend the rest of your days with them, then go-ahead.
Related: How to Get Over the Fear of Rejection in 10 Essential Steps
Bottom Line
We all want a relationship where we feel happy and are able to grow as individuals. Therefore, as we spend time with that special someone, it’s important for us to pay attention to our feelings. Stop thinking about what they think about you and instead figure out if this is someone that you really like and that you’d want for a partner.
It is important to realize that you are enough on your own, and there’s someone out there that will appreciate you for who you are. Make sure that you know what you want from a partner and use the indicators mentioned in this article to understand if you truly like someone. The right partner will have a way of finding you when you least expect it.
