Anger is an emotion everyone feels now and again. While it’s usually experienced momentarily, some instances become consuming and impact every aspect of life. When anger and resentment take over a person’s life, it’s important to learn how to let go of anger and find a balance in life that brings peace of mind for improved mental health and well-being.
It’s a common emotion which is often a result of legitimate reasons, though the sad truth is that anger can overshadow a person’s life and hurt many aspects of life, causing more harm than good.
Following a difficult or infuriating experience with a person or situation, it’s hard to let go and move forward, especially where many hurt personal emotions are involved.
Therefore, it’s vital to channel anger in a healthy, constructive way to avoid allowing it to control everything.
This article explores important and life-improving tips and advice that can help achieve a better place mentally, emotionally, and physically by offering peace of mind and letting go of the stress and negative impact of feeling angry.
1. Find the Source of Your Anger
Some reasons for anger are obvious and may stem from an emotional interaction, betrayal from a close friend or relative, or an unjust or unfair circumstance that rightfully makes a person angry.
In other situations, anger may brew for a while and develop from a long string of negative experiences or situations that can’t be readily resolved. In any case, it’s important to recognize the source of anger because it impacts how you feel when you interact with other people.
Is there a specific person or scenario at work that’s the source of anger? An example would be a supervisor or manager who bullies or makes offensive or insulting remarks. Sometimes it’s not easy to confront them, and it’s easier to take out the frustration on coworkers or other individuals who aren’t to blame for this behavior.
But, unfortunately, the hurt experienced during these interactions will only cause resentment and isolate an individual from other people, who may be in a position to help and support them.
Take a step back and evaluate all the main aspects of life. Sometimes anger comes from not feeling confident or feelings of inadequacy. Observe how you feel when thinking about family, work, friends, home, and more specific people and issues.
Pinpoint when you feel angry, and develop a way to describe how a specific person or situation makes you feel in a calm, civilized, yet expressive tone. In some cases, there is a way to escape or keep a distance from certain relationships physically and emotionally.
Where this is not possible, it’s important to approach the individual(s) involved and express the concerns related to the anger. This is an important step to finding a sense of personal control and setting boundaries, where necessary. It also gives the other person or people a glimpse from another perspective into how they treat others.
2. Set Boundaries and Avoid Unhealthy Relationships
A break-up with a spouse or partner or a strained friendship or family relation are often sources of deep-rooted anger. At times, confronting someone who is the source of anger and resentment can become highly stressful and painful. In addition, it can make some people feel vulnerable, especially if the source or person is abusive or creates a negative environment.
When there are feelings of resentment and anger towards someone, it’s best to step aside and assess the value of the relationship. Is the person toxic and unhealthy for your mental health? In severe cases, the mere presence of a manipulative or challenging personality can be triggering and hard to escape. Setting boundaries is a helpful way to establish and regain personal control.
Unfortunately, toxic people often cross the line and continue to impact a person’s life indefinitely, even if they are not actively present. Setting a firm set of rules means demanding respect, not tolerating abusive behavior, or simply avoiding the person at all costs. Boundaries are especially essential for divorced parents sharing custody or work-related relationships that require ongoing interactions with challenging personalities.
3. Practice Meditation and Breathing Exercises
Meditation and deep, measured breathing techniques are powerful ways to feel better and improve a state of mind. However, anger creates a hostile environment within. Without careful self-monitoring, our personal energy becomes tense, causing people to react instead of assessing their experiences and releasing those negative thoughts and emotions.
Yoga, meditation and prayer can have a significant impact on a person’s mental health and well-being. For example, many people find aromatherapy helps them relax after a stressful day at work. Diffusing essential oils is one way to remove your focus from stressful experiences and allow the mind and body to release and relax. For individuals new to practicing relaxation techniques, start with aromatherapy and listening to calming music or soundscapes.
Soothing music and nature sounds can immediately improve emotions and create a calm space at home. It lets the mind let go of tension and anger and melt into the moment to enjoy the present.
Meditation is beneficial for starting the day off in a healthy way. Taking just ten minutes in the morning, during a break at work, or in the evening, allows the brain to release from any tension and embrace happiness.
It’s a great way to feel better, even if there are only five minutes to spare. Find a quiet room or space to practice deep breathing and let go of any frustration and anger to regain a sense of power and control.
4. Get Active with Yoga and Regular Exercise
Regular physical activity has a major benefit for the mind and body. It’s also a highly effective way to release stress within the moment and for the long term. Exercise offers a wide range of health advantages that improve physical well-being, happiness, and mental stimulation.
When you feel angry, exercise is a great way to use this energy positively. A quick morning jog, a short ride on the bicycle, or getting active in other ways can give many people the ability to process feelings productively while improving their quality of life every day.
5. Forgiveness and Learning to Let it Go
Forgiveness may be the last option some people consider when they are angry, especially when a person’s actions or words are hurtful. A toxic person can lead us to feel resentment and rage, even thoughts of revenge, and as a result we hold onto anger for months, even years, after a specific behavior or action against us has occurred.
While forgiving someone may not change the other person’s behavior, this process is important for letting go of the anger and finding a better sense of peace.
Letting go of the past is an important step in finding peace of mind. Holding onto anger holds a person back from enjoying life. It has a depressive impact on the brain and can cause more harm than good towards the person who caused the hurt in the first place.
To forgive the other person doesn’t let them off with their wrong behavior, but it offers a chance to let go and move on in a positive direction. Forgiveness doesn’t require forgetting what the person has done, though this process provides a feeling free of pain and will help bring some peace to your life.
Remember that when you forgive someone, you don’t need to necessarily open up your life to them again. As previously mentioned, it is important to ensure that boundaries are put in place, so that you don’t continue to get hurt.
6. Talk to a Close Friend or Relative
Anger is a strong emotion that is difficult to put into words sometimes. It’s important to find ways to express anger and frustration in constructive ways, which also provide a means to work through the issues and heal in the process.
A trusted friend is someone who will give their full attention when they are confided in. They are non-judgmental, calm, and ready to listen. A good friend or close relative may offer a perspective to reframe a situation that can better understand with helpful advice.
Use words that best convey your emotions without venting or pushing past boundaries. Limit the talk to a few minutes, and give a friend a chance to reflect on the situation at the moment, and respond with meaningful advice or suggestions later.
Sometimes, just talking about a situation is a relief in itself and feels like a weight is lifted, resulting in greater happiness and peace in the long term.
7. Avoid Holding Grudges and Focus on Moving Forward
Holding a grudge is an expected response when someone causes pain and hurt, though it’s emotionally unhealthy and can lead to rage and negative energy. It’s an emotional state that grows very toxic in itself, causes great harm to a healthy life, and impacts other relationships. Letting go is not easy, although it’s an essential way to emotionally regain a sense of well-being.
Every person will experience a difficult interaction or situation, now and again, that is difficult to move past. It can conjure up feelings of resentment and a loss of control.
Using empathy to assess the situation and see things from another perspective can help you to forgive and let go of feelings that cause stress and pain. Then, you can focus on moving forward and developing productive, healthy relationships and a reduced stress response.
8. Develop Solutions
It’s common to feel like the victim when someone is toxic, abusive, and situations are hard to control or improve. It’s natural to get angry and feel this way for a prolonged time, though it’s not going to help resolve any issues.
However, when the focus shifts away from anger and towards a resolution, there is less incentive for you to react angrily and you can instead focus on positivity and how the situation can be solved.
It’s important to realize when things are out of control, which doesn’t mean there aren’t ways to understand better and improve life. Write down important thoughts or experiences to better evaluate them for your personal growth.
Writing down your thoughts and feelings can lead to processing emotions, including anger, more constructively. It’s not always easy or possible to fully change situations, though it is possible to evaluate a relationship, friendship, or environment and change a reaction or response.
Developing solutions means focusing on progress and learning to take back power while navigating away from negative situations and people.
9. Write Feelings, Thoughts, and Experiences in a Journal
What is the root cause of anger? It’s often not easy to let go of anger until the source is addressed. This process requires analyzing which aspects of life, including people, relationships, and environments, can impact self-esteem and awareness.
Writing down where your anger comes from, can help you positively identify the issue and then you can use that emotion in a more constructive, self-building action.
Keeping a journal gives people a greater sense of power and awareness about all contributing factors in life. It’s a way to document everything, from writing about accomplishments and emotions to feelings of inadequacy and struggles with work and personal issues.
What does anger look like? It’s not always rage and heated arguments. Writing a blog with relatable posts and discussing common experiences builds a solid foundation for healing and processing anger calmly and creatively.
If visual arts are more favorable to you then write, paint, or draw those emotions and experiences. This self-expression is highly therapeutic and allows people to feel more confident in facing their thoughts and feelings without suppressing them.
10. Letting Go of Anger by Changing Your Environment
Take a good look at your immediate environment and surroundings in life. Work, home, and common places play a significant role in emotional health. Some places and people can weigh a person down, especially where they are the source of frustration and anger.
It’s important to set aside personal time to take a break and remind yourself that there’s always a way to escape, to move away from a difficult or stressful situation.
There will always be unavoidable situations involving colleagues at work, family events, or people in the immediate community. So, take extra personal time to prepare ahead and allow yourself time to build confidence, such as meditation and spending time alone. The night before a stressful meeting or conference can be a great opportunity to focus on handling stress and avoid feeling rushed or angry when there’s an easy way to avoid it.
11. Don’t Worry About Small Problems
Achieving peace of mind means forgoing the small problems and incidental issues that are mere inconveniences. The small issues that may or may not be within our control, don’t need to have a major impact in our life and whether or not we are happy.
It’s important to avoid letting the small stuff affect you. Instead, push off feelings of irritation and anger. It’s natural to get frustrated, especially in highly stressful situations, though small issues will only last momentarily, including their chemical reactions on the brain and body.
Focus on the good things and let go of the minor issues that will pass on their own. It’s vital to focus on what is important and essential matters in life, which help us feel free and happy.
12. Avoid Hurtful, Abusive People and Situations
Not all situations and people can be avoided, though it’s important to keep the distance as much as possible to preserve happiness. It’s easier to let go of anger when the causes of it are not present. Surround yourself with people and situations who instill confidence in you and make you feel good.
Toxic people will try to make others feel inferior, which can quickly lead to anger. Not allowing these individuals to impact personal emotions and trigger angry responses isn’t easy, but it’s possible.
Keep the focus on positivity, and don’t respond to negative comments and people. Everyone has the means to control a response, even if the toxic person or situation isn’t rational.
13. Embrace Humor
A good sense of humor goes a long way to healing from hurt and anger. Laughter is deeply therapeutic, whether it comes from reading a funny blog post or picture or relating with someone who shares the same sense of humor. Keep jokes light-hearted and fun. It’s one of the easiest ways to diffuse anger and frustration.
14. Take Time Off and Practice Self Care
Whether it’s a day off work or scheduling a weekend getaway, taking a short break is essential to recharging your energy and enjoying the smaller things in life. Everyday, it’s also vital to take a few minutes, at the very least, to relax and reflect on the positive things in life.
Enjoy a meal at a nice restaurant, or take a day trip out of town to enjoy a meaningful and healthy break from the everyday challenges.
Many people underestimate the importance of taking a vacation or break from everyday life. Many companies promote the idea of work-life balance, although many individuals feel pressured to work overtime or take extra side jobs to make ends meet.
For many people, a long, extended vacation doesn’t fit into their life. However, even a one or two-day break can positively affect the quality of life.
15. Pause Before Speaking
It’s easy to vent in a fit of rage, especially when someone is very offensive and causes lots of grief; as hard as it is in the moment, taking a brief pause before speaking can make a significant impact. It can mean the difference between saying something regrettable or equally hurtful and a phrase or response that is highly impactful.
16. Find an Assertive Voice
Being assertive is a way to express and defend personal views without venting in an aggressive, uncontrollable rage. It’s a means to convey important thoughts and views firmly, and respectfully that doesn’t involve anger.
17. Use Stress-Relief Tools
Mobile devices offer some great apps and tools for stress relief to manage anger. Puzzles, games, meaningful quotes, and ideas are all helpful in improving our mood. Stress balls, chewing gum, and other small habits or items can also go a long way to making things better.
18. Know When to Get Professional Support and Help
Sometimes, it’s not easy to let go of anger. A person or situation can be too unbearable or difficult to cope with, and anger can elevate to a point where physical and emotional health is at risk. There are plenty of great support groups, counselors, and other qualified individuals who will listen and provide the support needed to get through tough situations and help you navigate through difficult emotions.
19. Don’t Be Hard on Yourself
Anger may originate from a place within, especially when people have become used to feeling inadequate or inferior. This may result from neglect or abuse from the past, which can have residual effects many years later.
Some people develop a sense of self-hatred because of these experiences, making it important to go easy on yourself. Don’t be too hard on yourself, give yourself time to work through the anger and move on in a healthy way.
20. Find What Makes You Happy
There are many simple ways to improve life without spending lots of money or making too much effort. You can get involved in hobbies and activities that promote self-expression and genuine happiness.
Join an exercise class, explore a new park for hiking, or learn a new skill. It’s also a great way to learn how to let go of anger and embrace a more free way of living.
How to Let Go of Anger: A Summary
Letting go of anger is a process that takes time. Take small steps towards working through angry feelings and thoughts while learning how to express them in a healthy and productive way. It’s an important practice that greatly improves mental and physical health and provides a way to heal from the source of anger and the impact it has had on your life.