10 Signs He Wants A Serious Relationship With You & 5 Signs He Doesn’t

Do you think he’s ready for a serious relationship? You may have a gut feeling, but it’s not always easy to tell if your guy is ready to move to the next level. 

If you’re struggling to understand his feelings about the relationship, he’s probably not ready to commit anyway.

However, if you’ve seen signs that he wants a more serious relationship but you’re not just not one hundred percent sure yet, read on. 

In this article, we’ll take on the role of an online relationship coach by listing over ten signs that he’s ready for a committed relationship and five signs that he’s not.

Ten signs he wants a serious relationship with you

So, how do you know if he’s ready? If the following applies to his behavior, that’s a good sign that he’s ready. 

Understand that these signs do not guarantee that he’s ready for something serious, but they’ll at least help you clarify where you stand.

1. He talks about the relationship openly

If he’s willing to talk about your relationship openly, that’s a good sign that he’s ready to take it a step further. It’s not a green light to get serious just yet, but his willingness to talk means that a serious, long-term relationship may be on the cards.

If he’s unwilling to talk about where you two are right now and seems elusive when the topic of a serious relationship comes up, he’s not ready. 

If that’s how he feels, it’s best not to push it. Pushing him to talk and consider a serious relationship when he’s not ready will place distance between you and him and possibly deter him altogether.

2. He’s consistent

The man who wants a healthy relationship with you will be consistent with his love and affection. 

He won’t make you chase him, and he won’t play games. He’ll be self-assured in how he feels about you and try to show you that he’s here and cares.

He won’t be consistent if he’s not ready for a relationship or doesn’t want one. He’ll give you attention sometimes but pull away without explaining. 

Don’t be disappointed if he behaves as such, but understand that such behavior is not aligned with a man who wants to be in a real, mature, adult relationship with you.

signs he wants a serious relationship with you

3. He introduces you to friends and family

If he has an image of you in the future, he’ll be happy to introduce you to his friends and family. Most men are reluctant to introduce a woman to their close friends and family unless they believe she will be around for the long term. 

If he’s making introductions, that’s a good sign that he wants to keep you around.

Alternatively, if he doesn’t introduce you but keeps your relationship a secret, he’s not ready for a relationship. 

What kind of relationship would it be if it’s just the two of you all the time with no outside interaction? Not a healthy one.

4. He opens up to you

One of the most significant signs that he’s willing to share a close relationship with you is his willingness to open up about his vulnerabilities.

Men grow up with a tendency to become stoics, at least on the surface. 

Men commonly hold back on their emotions and out on a tough façade even when they feel vulnerable. 

If he opens up to you and freely speaks about his fears, worries, joys, and passions, that’s a great sign!

His opening up is not exactly a sign that he wants a relationship. Still, it’s a far better ingredient for a successful relationship than an unwillingness or inability to share such things.

5. He doesn’t rush physical intimacy

One significant sign that he’s interested in having a serious relationship with you and not just a casual fling is that he doesn’t want to jump straight into bed. 

Mature men understand that a relationship is not all about sex, that sex is an integral part of a romantic connection and intimacy, but it’s not the main event. 

If he wants something serious, he’ll take the intimacy slowly and with patience.

6. He makes time and space for you in his life

Even when we enter a relationship, it’s still important to prioritize our wants and needs. It can seem romantic at first when somebody prioritizes you over their own needs, but that’s a huge red flag. 

Still, bringing another person into one’s life involves shifting and rearranging. 

If you notice that he’s making an effort to spend time with you and reorganizing his schedule so that you two can spend quality time together, that’s an undeniable sign that he wants things to progress. 

If he didn’t care about going further with your relationship, he wouldn’t go that extra mile.

7. He wants to be exclusive

Perhaps the most obvious sign that he wants a serious relationship with you is to be exclusive. He doesn’t want to see other women, and he doesn’t want you to see other guys, either.

If he doesn’t care about having a serious relationship, then it’s unlikely for him to stop seeing other women. His willingness to be with you and only you show that he’s ready to invest, commit, and make a relationship with you work.

signs he wants a serious relationship with you

8. He’s comfortable with intimacy (without sex)

A man interested in a serious relationship won’t make your interactions all about sex. 

If he’s mature enough, he’ll understand that a real, healthy relationship is about far more than that. He’ll realize that sex is a natural part of love but not a prerequisite. 

If you want to wait, he’ll wait for you. If you don’t want to wait, he may suggest you do. 

In addition to patience, the man who wants to be with you long-term will feel comfortable with intimate moments that don’t involve sex. 

Kissing, holding, and touching are all appreciated for what they are and are not taken as an invitation for sex to follow.

9. He shares information about past relationships

One of the more subtle signs that he wants a relationship with you is that he shares information about past relationships, such as what went wrong, what went right, and what he learned about himself, attitudes, and behavior regarding relationships in general. 

Such a conversation is an opportunity for you two to learn more about each other and establish some ground rules for a potential relationship.

10. He includes you in his future plans

If he mentions you when he talks about his future plans, generally marriage, children, or some other crucial joint venture, then there’s a good chance he wants to commit to you. 

He may also just be talking about ideas and hypotheticals, but if he has no intention of something serious, he will not mention those things in the first place.

Five signs he wants to keep it casual

Some guys want you, but they don’t want a serious relationship

They want the benefits of having you around, such as your attention, affection, and the fun you two have together, but they don’t want the commitment. 

That’s perfectly normal – there’s nothing wrong with a casual relationship. 

The important thing is that both parties understand the dynamic and that one is not leading the other on.

Ideally, he’ll healthily communicate to you that he’s not looking for a serious relationship, but if you’re not sure where you stand, there are some tell-tale signs.

1. He keeps you a secret

If he doesn’t tell his friends or family about you or mentions you but never invites you to hang out with them, he’s probably not ready for a serious relationship. 

His close ones are sure to ask about you after you hang out, so if there’s no label and he’s not looking to make one, he’d probably rather avoid all the interrogation.

2. He avoids ‘the talk’

Where is this relationship going? Does he see a future together? If he’d rather not answer these questions but changes the subject or avoids the question completely, he’s not looking for something serious.

signs he wants a serious relationship with you

3. He acts cold and distant

If he’s begun to act cold and distant toward you, something may be on his mind. However, it may just be that he doesn’t want to invest too much emotional energy into what you two have together.

Committing to a serious relationship takes commitment and assuredness, and if he’s not ready for that yet or doesn’t want it all, he’ll hold back on attention and affection from time to time. He doesn’t want to make you think that a more committed relationship is on the cards, so he’ll play it safe.

Of course, whatever he wants, he should communicate with you about it. Even if he’s not ready for another level of closeness and intimacy, that should be clarified.

4. He sees other women

If he’s dating you while also seeing other women, he probably doesn’t want to say goodbye to the others just yet. Having multiple casual partners in one’s dating life is normal, but this should be communicated clearly.

If he leads you on by making you think that you’re the only woman in his life and you later discover that there are others, that’s a sign of disrespect, and you should treat it as such. 

Again, you two are not together, so he has the freedom to see other people. However, both of your intentions should be clear to continue a healthy relationship.

5. He tells you he doesn’t want a relationship

Believe him if he tells you he’s not looking for a serious relationship and that he doesn’t want to be so deeply involved with someone right now. 

Don’t make the common mistake of thinking you may change his mind. Respect his word and make your own decision about how comfortable you are in the established dynamic.

Conclusion

Serious relationships require healthy communication. So, the best way to know if he wants something serious with you is to open a healthy communication channel on the topic.

He may be interested in a relationship but not ready just yet, and that’s fine. At least you’ll know that a relationship is on the cards. 

Equally, healthy communication means that he’ll let you know if a relationship is not on the cards, and from there, you can make your own decision about what you want moving forward.

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