Do you find yourself wondering how your guy friend feels about you? Is he okay with being just friends, or does he want something more? Has he been acting weird lately, and you do not know why? Got a sense that he has got some feelings for you? This article will look at some obvious and subtle signs that your male friend has feelings for you and what you can do about it.
12 signs your male friend has feelings for you
Your male friend has been acting a little differently lately, and you are not sure what is going on. You have a sense that his behavior change has something to do with you because he only seems to act differently when you are around. You get the sense that maybe he has some feelings for you, but you are not sure.
If that describes your situation, you are not the first person to wonder. Friendships often lead to feelings, but dealing with those feelings is rarely straightforward. People are reluctant to open up about how they feel about others, especially to a friend with whom they have a romantic interest, because it risks ruining the friendship.
If you want to know what is going on with him, check out some of the most obvious signs that he is interested in you romantically.
1. He makes an effort to look good around you
When we like someone, we want to look good around them. Sometimes that means dressing our absolute best when we know we will see them. Sometimes it is more subtle, like styling one’s hair a certain way or making sure we look clean and tidy when we anticipate seeing our crush.
This sign is easy to spot if you two have been friends for a while. At times, he does not make an effort to look a certain way—maybe his feelings for you have only recently developed. However, if you feel that he likes you and his behavior aligns with a few of the other signs in this list, you should have noticed his recent extra effort regarding his appearance.
Even if he does not dress up, he will still fix himself up when you approach. He might brush his hair, assume a taller posture, or relax his face to look more friendly. Has he been wearing more cologne lately? Have you caught him spending more time in the mirror when you hang out? If he is making that extra effort, he wants you to notice.
2. He doesn’t flirt with other women (around you)
It is entirely normal for a single hetero man to flirt with women. Flirting is by its very nature fun, and the single among us does not need to feel bad if we want to flirt with several people at once.
Still, if a guy friend likes you, he will not even want to flirt with others. He might do so when you are not around, but he will not want you to get the wrong idea when you are in the picture.
This is a big sign that he likes you because it shows that his feelings for you are more important than flirting with others. He might also want to avoid making you think that he is not interested at all. It may take some time for him to tell you directly, but him not flirting with others is his way of telling you indirectly.
3. He tells his friends about you
One of the biggest signs that a guy friend likes you is that he tells his other friends about you. It becomes even more obvious when he cannot stop talking about you. If you are always on the tip of his tongue, it will become somewhat of a joke among his friends.
If you know someone from his group of friends, do not be surprised if one of his close friends tells you about it. His friends would rather want you to know the truth and talk about it than listen to him talking about you with no updates about the two of you getting together.
Remember that guys are pretty reluctant to tell their friends about a girl they like unless they are sure they like them. If he is at the ‘talking about you to his friends‘ stage, then that is a sign of romantic interest.
4. He always wants to hang out with you
Is he always keen to hang out? Does he call or text you randomly and ask you to go for coffee, walk in the park, or go to the cinema? If your guy friend likes you, he will want to hang out with you as much as possible.
He will make an extra effort to reach out and see if you want to spend time together. Sure, friends can reach out to each other to hang out, but if it is becoming a frequent occurrence, he might want to be more than just a friend.
5. He wants to know everything about you
One of the best things about friendship is that we bond with another person. Getting to know one another is a fun part of any friendship. If your guy friend likes you, he might try to know everything about you all at once. His interest in you will burn a little, and he will feel compelled to ask as many questions about your life and background as possible.
He might ask about your day, what you got up to, and your plans for the weekend. Again, friends can ask these questions to each other, but there is an extra layer of interest when romantic feelings are involved.
Has he been asking more questions than usual lately? Is he asking questions that seem to come out of nowhere? If he has become extra curious lately, he may have developed some feelings.
6. He takes an interest in your family
When we like someone, their family becomes far more interesting. If he likes you, then he will probably ask some questions about your family. He will want to know about your experiences growing up or how you feel about your family members.
If you two have been friends for a while and already know some of your family members, he might check in with you and ask about them more often.
7. He compliments you
One of the most tell-tale signs that your male friend has feelings for you is that he showers you with compliments. Even if he is not yet ready to tell you directly how he feels about you, his feelings will shine through in the other things he says.
He might tell you how pretty you look today, how that shirt or dress compliments the rest of your outfit, or how your hair looks nice when you wear it a certain way. He might also shift away from the physical and tell you how funny, smart, or interesting he thinks you are.
On the other hand, he might be reluctant to offer too many compliments. If the compliments were regular throughout your friendship, they might become less frequent if he has started to develop feelings.
The problem when developing feelings for a friend is that it can jeopardize the friendship if one party does not feel the same way. As such, he might hold back on compliments if he likes you because he does not want to make it so obvious.
8. You have a gut feeling that he likes you
Sometimes we just know that someone likes us. There is chemistry, and your gut instinct tells you, ‘hey, this person is interested in you.‘ It is not always easy to trust our gut feeling about who does and does not like us, especially when it comes to friendships, but learning how to listen to your gut can put you a step ahead of the game.
Maybe it is the way he speaks to you, or maybe it is the subtle look in his eyes. Or maybe it is the chemistry—the sparks that fly when you two touch. Your gut sees many subtle signs, but your eyes do not.
9. He doesn’t talk about other women around you
Guys can be notorious for talking about women they like, especially among close friends. It is harmless fun and is simply a way for friends to bond most of the time. So, if you have been friends with him for some time already, you may have heard him talking about a woman he likes or something that happened between him and someone last weekend at a party or on a date the other day.
If that same friend has started to develop those feelings for you, he might stop talking to you about other women altogether. He will not want to come off as someone who sleeps around or does not take feelings and relationships seriously.
He will hold back on talking that way, and if you ask him about his love life, he will probably brush your question off or give you a vague answer. He might even tell you that he likes someone, but he is unsure what to do about it (hint, hint!)
10. He’s protective of you
How does he behave when he sees other guys approach you? Does he keep his eyes on you? Does he make himself look taller and bigger when he sees another guy flirting with you? Does he get suspicious of guys you date?
If he likes you, he will naturally become more protective than usual. Do not mistake protectiveness with being overbearing or smothering—protective in this sense just means that he is concerned about your well-being. It also means that he is cautious of other guys’ intentions with you and does not want you to get hurt. It also means that he is jealous when he sees you with other guys.
11. He gives you lots of attention
We naturally give our friends attention when we are hanging out with them. We look at them, ask questions about their day or the project they have been working on, and regularly check-in to see that they are alright. However, if your guy friend has feelings for you, he will give you more attention than usual. He will give you a lot more attention than his other female friends, that is for sure.
When you speak, he will listen to every word. He will remember the things you tell him and ask you about things you forgot to mention. He will remember the big and small details about you, such as your birthday or your favorite ice cream flavor. He will make an effort to like your latest social media posts and tell you how good you look.
If you have ever had feelings for someone, you know how easy it is to give them attention. You do not even notice how glued you have become to that person until you take some time away.
12. His body language is open around you
We say far more with our body language and behavior than we do with words. Body language is a powerful form of communication. When you learn to read, you develop a much clearer understanding of your social dynamics, people’s deeper feelings, and the messages you convey to others without speaking.
How does his body language change when you show up to hang out? Do you see him slouching from afar but sitting in almost perfect posture when you arrive? Does he maintain eye contact with you? Does he brush back his hair, fix his clothes, or check his appearance on his phone screen?
Does he direct his body towards yours, even when speaking in a group setting? Has he become more touchy than usual? Does he lean in close when you two speak?
These are all uses of body language that indicate romantic interest. If you also like him, match the energy of his body language. If he maintains eye contact, do the same. When speaking to him, direct your body in his direction. Do not hold back on light physical touch or mirroring.
Signs he has strong feelings for you
All of the signs above indicate that your guy friends have feelings for you. However, those feelings may be somewhat casual or more serious, and it is not always easy to tell. However, there are some signs that his feelings for you are strong.
- He includes you in his plans for the future.
- He always wants you to feel comfortable and never makes jokes or comments that might hurt your feelings.
- He speaks to his family about you.
- He tells you how much he loves you.
Sometimes a friend wants to be a little more than just friends. Sometimes a friend wants to change the friendship into a romantic relationship. Sometimes a friend enters the friend zone and wants to get out of it.
Figuring out your guy friend’s feelings and their degree can be hard, especially if he is the type to hold back on expressing them. Still, the signs included earlier and the more intense signs above should give you a good shot at guessing how he feels.
What to do if you like him back
When a guy likes you, he might not say it aloud, but it will shine through his behavior. If you like him, it helps to know the signs mentioned above. Knowing that he likes you helps you feel more confident about a potential romance between the two of you. Talk to him, flirt with him, and if you feel courageous enough, ask him straight up how he feels (and be willing to share your feelings back.)
What to do if you don’t like him back
Knowing the signs above is also helpful if you do not feel the same way about him. You can choose to tell him directly that you do not see him that way or drop hints. Remember that even if he likes you, that does not mean you need to treat him differently.
Just because he likes you does not mean you need to change your behavior or give him more time than you normally would. It can seem nice or friendly to entertain such a situation when you do not feel the same way in return, but both parties should be honest and upfront in the long run.
Feelings can be confusing, especially when two people are friends at first. They make us feel like we want to pursue our new romantic interest but also make us hesitant. Perhaps we will get hurt or ruin the friendship.
If your male friend has feelings for you, his mind is probably racing back and forth when he thinks about you. As much as you might want to ask him about it, sometimes you need to wait until he is ready to talk about it. Hopefully, the signs included in this article will help you more clearly understand how he feels and what you can do about it.